I Don't Like Your Girlfriend
by merryfortune
Summary: Saeko is pretty certain that if this first meeting had gone slightly differently, it would have been a fairy tale as she would have had a white stallion instead of her trusty motorcycle so she could have properly played the role of the noble knight saving the dazzlingly pastel Princess from the Far Off Fantasyland of Russia.


**I Don't Like Your Girlfriend**

Saeko was mesmerised. She was enchanted. Dare she say it but she's certain that she's in love.

For the past two minutes - actually, scratch that: Saeko checks her phone; it's been five minutes. For the past five minutes, Saeko was been watching this ethereal lady mind her own business.

Saeko has never seen a beautiful lady as this lady across the street. She looks like a college; a little younger than Saeko. This chick is gorgeous and Saeko is certain that it's love.

This lady looks fine. She's got shimmering silvery coloured hair and legs for days. She's pale and she's wearing the most beautifully coordinated outfit with an extraordinarily pastel aesthetic. When it comes to chicks, Saeko has a type. She likes a woman who could kick her ass in martial arts and could ride a motorcycle better than she can. This chick: she looks like cartoon birds braid her hair in the morning and select her shoes for her. She is the exact opposite of what Saeko usually looks for in her lovely ladies.

She wears a cream dress with this fantastic vintage floral print on it. Not the kitsch kind of vintage floral but the magical kind which make her look youthful and enchanting. It's a high waisted dress with peasant sleeves; it stops above her knees and she's got shapely calves which are accentuated by her white chunk sandals.

Seriously though, this chick has the longest legs that Saeko has ever seen. She's super tall too. She's got to be a foreigner so it seems unlikely Saeko will ever have the blessed pleasure of glimpsing this goddess again. That's why Saeko has stopped to stare. She's only on a cigarettes and sports drinks run. None of which are for her; there for the volleyball coaches. Her brother isn't expecting her for another hour, probably so there's no urgency. Hence why Saeko is sparked out on her motorcycle and waiting for the bus.

The lady is obviously waiting for the bus which should be here any moment now since it seems like it's been six minutes since she arrived at the bus stop. When she arrived, she checked the timetable then she stepped back so she wasn't a bother to other passer-bys.

Then she got a phone call and that's when Saeko fell super hard for how expressive she was. Saeko really hoped that she wasn't reacting to a boyfriend. Or a girlfriend. Saeko was desperately hoped that she was single, and gay or bi or something. That would be swell even though it was kind of useless. There was no way in hell that a chick like Saeko should go and chat up a chick like this beauty.

But apparently, three rough looking blokes think they can. Saeko grew apprehensive. She recognised the one with dyed red hair. She had dated him once. For like, five minutes. Guy was a scum bag but he could treat a girl to a fun Saturday night but probably not the kind of Saturday night this chick would like.

Saeko watched intently. So far, those scum bags were at a distance and the lady was still calm but Saeko plugged her keys into the ignition. She was ready to fight the moment anything suspicious happens. She revved up the motorcycle's engine and stuffed her open drink in one of the plastic bags she shouldn't have hanging off her handles.

She waited a moment.

The lady was taller than these dudes but she wasn't stronger and she was slowly becoming distressed by the conversation which was just out of earshot. Judging by those shit eating grins Ichirou's douchebag friends had, things had just gotten sexual.

Saeko glanced down the streets. The bus was still way off of.

Ichirou's put one of his dirty mitts on the girl's shoulder and she squealed. And that was where Saeko drew the line. She was ignited with bisexual fury. She was going to save this poor damsel and hopefully whisk this chick away into the mid afternoon sun.

Saeko pulled an illegal U-Turn so she could get to the other side of the street. Her wheels screamed as she came back around in a stretched out, violent swing.

Saeko skidded into the gutter next to the chick. She scowled as ferociously as she could as she channelled her inner superheroine.

'Sup scum.' Saeko snarled.

Ichirou recognises her immediately and falters.

That's right punk, Saeko thinks to herself.

'Maybe we should just fuck off.' he suggests.

His friends look at him like he was insane so naturally, they suggest something even crazier: 'Orgy!'

The chick screams and whilst Saeko is not against the idea, she knows this is not the time. She locks onto the girl and extends her hand.

'Can I help you, pretty lady?' she asked. 'I promise I won't bite.' She resists adding "Two much" onto her literal pick-up line.

The chick is terrified. She glances between her two options and makes the bold decision to latch onto Saeko's hand. Her hand delicately wraps around and Saeko roughly brings her onto the bike. She revs it up and the girl giggles; thrilled. A good sign.

Saeko addressed her ex and his douchebag friends. 'If any of you even breathe in this chick's direction, I will hunt you down and make sure none of you fucks can have kids because none of you should be harassing women!' she barks.

The motorcycle whirs off. The lady clings on tightly for safety. Her arms wrap tightly around Saeko's waist and she likes how it feels. She notices that her arms are chubbier than she originally noticed and its adorable as anything. The lady's scared and exhilarated all at once; from what Saeko can tell using her peripheries and her mirrors. She speeds off at first and then slows down she knows those gross men can't get to them.

Saeko pulls over safely as she can; which translates as not very.

The lady uncoils from around Saeko and she flattens her mussed up hair. Saeko spins around and grins.

'So how's that for a meet cute.' she jokes.

'It's good to meet you, thank you. I was so scared. I mean, I still am scared but I feel safer with you. Sort of. Please tell me you have a licence for this thing because I'm certain they're not supposed to be driven that way.' she says.

Saeko goes embarrassedly silent. 'Totally.'

She smiles. A soft, pretty smile on peachy lips and Saeko's heart melts.

'I'm Alisa Haiba; it's a pleasure to make your acquaintance.' she offers.

'Tanaka Saeko.' Saeko replied automatically.

She had been right. This chick was a foreigner but she didn't sound like it. She spoke Japanese flawlessly; not even the faintest hint of an accent although; she didn't roll her "L".

'That's a really cute name. I've always liked the same "Saeko".' Alisa confessed.

'Uh, thanks.' Saeko replied and she scratched behind her head. 'I'm sorry, kinda took you away from the bus stop. Can I run you somewhere, I'm not busy today.'

'That'd be great thank you!' Alisa gushed. 'I need to ger to Karasuno High School. My little brother Lev is playing volleyball today. I'm here for moral support and to enjoy the countryside. We're from Tokyo.'

'No friggin' way. Is your brother Lev freaky tall and from Nekoma?' Saeko asked.

'How did you know?' Alisa gasped.

'My little brother – captain of his team, mind you – is playing Nekoma today in a volleyball match. We must've just missed each other; did you come on the bus?' Saeko asked.

'I did. My, what a coincidence.' Alisa chuckled.

'It'd be my pleasure to run you to Karasuno.' Saeko replied. 'I feel like we have a lot more than that in common.'

'I was just about to say the same thing.' Alisa admitted.

Saeko swung back around. Alisa scooted closer and wrapped her arms around Saeko. She pressed herself against Saeko and cuddled in close. She rested her chin on Saeko's shoulder.

'Hang on tight since we don't have helmets.' Saeko said and she turned the engine on.

'I intend to.' Alisa murmured in Saeko's ear.

Saeko laughed and she kicked off. Her motorcycle trundled along before breaking into its full speed without so much as sputter.

Alisa hung on tightly and Saeko really enjoyed the attention. But she enjoyed most was what Alisa mumbled in her ear somewhat seductively: 'I'm gay.'

 _SCORE!_

'And I'm bisexual as fuck.' Saeko replied, growly as she contended with the wind that surged past them.

Alisa laughed. Maybe it was because of the wind but it sort of sounded like a cross between popping bubbles and a cat's purr. Thus, Saeko couldn't help but remember her conclusions from early: she, a somewhat butch and somewhat delinquent college student, was definitely in love with this adorably pastel, foreigner chick.


End file.
